How it Started...

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Here she is. This cute little house in the worst shade of boring beige. We’d been married about 8 months and were ready to get out of my builder’s special condo. A friend lived a block away from this house, and it came on the market with an open house. We’d never seen it before, so on the way to a family dinner, we stopped by.

First Impressions

My first impression was more than I had bargained for. We got out of the car and the neighbors from across the street yelled out “Are you going to be our new neighbors?” They were a white-haired couple and we talked for several minutes. They told us they’d been living on the street for their whole married life. Lived down the street in one house before moving the family to the one directly across from this one. Precious. The meeting left me warm and fuzzy before even stepping in the front door. Which maybe took the edge off a bit for what I was about to see.

Beige for Days

Once inside I was delighted to see…more beige. Definitely not the beautiful modern shade of greige that Chip and JoJo made popular, but straight-up beige. I may be harsh with my judgment but all the tones of brown mixed together just brought me back to my New Jersey upbringing circa 1980. Beige walls, beige carpet, brown sofa. Wood accents..you get the drift. Not the best representation of design, historically speaking.

The color scheme was enough to make my coastal decor-loving insides scream. However, my HGTV-loving brain started firing off flash bulbs. It had some original house charm with some not so updated improvements. But what it really had, was potential. I wasn’t looking for perfect, just something I could work with. There was a good amount of space to use, and it already had some open concept to it.

I mean, dear god..look at this kitchen. I never really was quite sure what that was hanging over the door to the laundry room. But it would go. Everything would be fine. The kitchen could be a blank slate. This was a fixer upper for sure.

There were 3 bedrooms and supposedly 2 bathrooms. The second bathroom was a recent add-on, and it was tiny, awkward, and horrendous. Both bathrooms were gross…but I already decided they would not stay. The second-floor bedrooms would work, but the one on the first floor would have to go. This was all decided while just walking through the house. I had visions of fresh wood floors and beautiful new tiles everywhere I looked.

Let’s Head Outside

Outside the wrap-around porch and back yard with trees and some unkept bushes were also inspiring some changes. A creepy van sat in the far back of the lot that was lined by an alley…my husband swears it said “Candy” on the side. Somewhat of a blank slate to work with out here. I had seen all I needed to see.

We thanked the realtor and got his card, and were on our way to eat at our in-laws. By the time we got home I had some grand plans for this beige beauty. Maybe we could add a second floor to the back? Or add a whole new addition? The possibilities were endless, and god bless Rory for entertaining every one of them.

Added drama

The simple end to this story would be that we placed an offer, and Oila!, we are on our way to owning a home. But nope, not the ending to this story. We tried to look at the house again, only to find out the realtor who showed it had quit. Now the agency broker had taken over, and she was hot to get this thing off her hands. She claimed there were offers. Somehow we let her talk us into having her be our buying agent too…so now she was our realtor, and we were putting in an offer.

The bright side to this was that it was 2009, and the housing market was fairly low at the time. We took her advice on the offer, which in hindsight, was likely exactly what her client wanted to sell it for. It was reasonable either way. They accepted the offer, and we were on our way to owning a home…

Nope..not yet. Let’s talk about the owner, first, shall we?

Another Man’s Treasure

Yes, the van did belong to the owner. No, he wasn’t living in the house. This gentleman lived in another house a few blocks away. He was a professor at a local college, and also a comedian. He had actually filmed a short reality TV show in our house called “Another Man’s Treasure” where he decorated our house entirely with items found in the trash. Alas, no video can be found after conducting a thorough internet search, but the curtain in the photo below was said to be part of the show.

Anyway, this guy was frequently busy, so the back and forth of inspections and closing dates had to be finalized while we were on a trip to Europe in June. This was also not the days of cell phones in foreign countries…or Ipads or reliable internet for that matter. I recall trying to load pictures of the inspection on our hotel lobby computer and it took nearly all day to see what we needed to see.

Once back in the country, we were still moving into July with the signing date being moved back AGAIN because he was busy on Jeff Foxworthy’s yacht. Not even kidding…. (Do people even know who he is anymore?) Alas, the day finally came. The giant TV was moved, and the creepy van vanished. He did leave a few “reclaimed” decor items.